We all know that networking works when done right. Professional networking is not only key to unlocking opportunities, but creating a community of supportive colleagues. Whether you’re looking for a new job, launching a business, or even exploring a new hobby, your network can be the catalyst that propels you forward.
Unfortunately, however, many people are uncomfortable with networking. Why is that? Because conventional networking advice fails to address the real issue.
When you type “how to network” into a search engine, you’ll likely be bombarded with advice on mastering LinkedIn, crafting the perfect introductory emails, practicing elevator pitches and small talk, and nailing the follow-up after a networking event. The common thread running through all these tips? Suck it up and dive in.
In this article, we’ll explore why networking is about more than meeting new people and swapping business cards. Instead, it’s about forging genuine connections, keeping in touch with contacts, and skillfully turning contacts into meaningful business opportunities.
The problem is that you have to work at it
Networking is inherently transactional, which can feel unnatural to most people – especially for those who are shy or reluctant to ask for help. They often hesitate to reach out, imagining how they would feel if roles were reversed.
Feeling uncomfortable about building a relationship based on what someone can offer is understandable. But that often stems from the assumption you’re solely taking from the relationship, without contributing anything in return. So, instead of avoiding working on networking because you don’t want to be a taker, consider your role as a giver in the interaction.
As Robert Cialdini explains in his book, “Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion”, people feel compelled to return favors, gifts, or services they’ve received first. In other words, by giving first, people will naturally reciprocate. But, as Cialdini points out, the secret is to be the first to offer something that’s both personal and unexpected. In doing so, you may not even need to ask for help.
Of course, when it comes to networking strategies, whether online, in person, or through email, it’s important to do what comes naturally. But don’t underestimate the Principle of Reciprocity – it goes beyond small talk to elevate your networking approach and practice to a whole new level.
Do more than keep in touch
When you seek professional advice or support, or make the rounds at a networking event, you’re actually giving people a chance to help you. In this way, you’re recognizing their expertise and experience, and offering them the opportunity to use their influence to benefit others.
Are you awkward when it comes to networking? You’re not alone. Except for a small group of confident extroverts, everyone struggles with networking. But by shifting your perspective from taking to giving, you can cultivate personal and professional skills while navigating the networking world with confidence. And don’t forget the importance of staying in touch with business contacts – it’s the glue that holds your network together.